For years he dated young tattooed women who were drawn to him—who wouldn’t be;  he’s got the biggest heart in the world—and then wanted to change him.  He gave up after a while; most of them just wanted to be friends, anyway; ask him for advice and then never take it.  He knew everyone but had two close friends:  Sheila, who served as his cat; and John, who was his dog.  Sheila had a contrary opinion for every on of Jack’s and enjoyed sparring; she probably would have slept on his laptop and wandered on his keyboard if that was available for a human. John lived one apartment over from Jack and would come by every night that Jack was available.  He had a key to the apartment but always, always knocked and said “It’s John; can I come in?”  He’d answer Jack’s phone.  “Jack O’Connell’s apartment; this is John; how can I help you?”  Come to think of it, he was more of a butler than a dog.  He’d sit in the big reclining chair, quietly cleaning his guns.  We lived in Nebraska, guys.  This is not an unusual activity.

Mom finally stopped loading up grocery bags with creamed corn and toilet paper when Jack was 26; and he stopped doing laundry at their house when he was 27.  Small milestones on the path to adulthood.  It wasn’t that he was taking advantage; it was just that it was an opportunity to see Mom and Dad. It seemed to be important to her to still take care of Jack and hey, look; free food!

His best friend from high school, Mike, fell in love—or in something—with Sarah.  Jack met her and thought well, she’s the one for me, and I’ll never be able to tell her.  He was best man at their wedding.  Because Mike was a Viking re-enactor, the best man was in chain mail but we all have our quirks.  And then after two years Mike decided he’d go Viking full-time, and Sarah decided no, not so much, and they divorced.  Mike is still angry and won’t have anything to do with her; it’s been fifteen years.  Way to hold a grudge.

And then time went by, and Sarah married again and had two boys, and then that marriage went south and Sarah thought I’m doing something wrong.  I don’t know what it is, but if I keep going south instead of north I’m going to go crazy.  Who is the nicest man I know?  What family do I want to be a part of?

Ah.  Facebook.  Jack.

So she reached out; and he reached back out; and they dated for six months; and then she introduced him to her sons (because she is a good person and didn’t want them to have to deal with men she wasn’t going to be with long-term).  They came to our wedding; him proud; she radiant.  She charmed everyone she met.  And then they married, and we all burst our buttons over the rightness of this, the absolute perfection of the two of them.

Jack said “You know what?  I always wanted a family.  I have one.  I’ll never let it go.”  He called them His Boys from the first day.  When he was gone on a business trip Sarah took his clothing and stuffed it and put it on the couch so Oscar and Hank could still have a Jack to cuddle up to.

Family.  One finds it; and then one makes it.